A lot of things can change during a relationship as you get to know your partner better. Some couples meet ends while others fall to an end.
Whether if you lost feelings for one another, someone cheated, or if the relationship you have is toxic, one thing common in all of those situations which is the happiness, excitement, thrill, and love you had once before in your relationship is no longer there or the same compared to back when you just started dating.
What’s Holding You Back?
If you are in a long-term relationship, chances are you’re having second thoughts if you should break up with your partner or not.
The most common thoughts would be is that you are afraid that you might not find another partner, you cherish those memories you had, you think you can fix what’s broken, etc.
Are You Sure of your Decision?
There are several factors you should look into first because it’s possible that you might regret your decision, which will most likely put you in a terrible position wherein you are the one who broke up but you are also the one who is struggling after the break up.
Think it through before you make your decision.
What Should You Say?
If you are positive and certain about your decision about separating from your partner. The next step would be to formulate what you are about to say. Give complete closure. Leave no detail behind – tell him or her what you are feeling with all honesty.
Make sure you take your time with this because you might find yourself still stuck in the relationship if you say the wrong statements.
Always remember that you should be careful with what you are going to say because since you are ending the relationship, you might as well break up with him or her in a respectful way.
When Do You Break Up with Your Partner?
Definitely do not break up with your partner online. It is totally different than talking face-to-face. Find time and tell your partner you have a serious matter to discuss in private. If your partner is going through some troubles, be considerate and give him or her the space she needs to recover.
This is also a great opportunity for you to take some time to reflect upon your decision.
Should You Wait it Out?
There is no doubt that it could be very difficult for some to start a conversation that is about the verge of your ending relationship. This is the reason why some choose to wait it out first.
There are only two outcomes from waiting
#1 – It will only make things worse
#2 – You’ll realize that the both of you can work things out
This is why you should consider waiting it out if you are in no rush of breaking up. You might be just unsure of your feelings which might eventually make you want to work things out with your partner.
However, if waiting out only made things worse – then it’s time to break up.
What You Should Do
If you are 100% sure that you want to break up with your partner, here are factors you should take into consideration.
1. Do not Ghost
Ghosting or ignoring your partner for days, weeks, and even months will only complicate things. Your partner might reach out to your family and friends, which you definitely want to avoid.
2. Be Sensitive
As aforementioned, be respectful and have good intentions. Do not insult or degrade your partner. Breaking up with him or her is already too much. So, be careful of your words.
3. Be Honest
This is the final time you will speak to your partner as in a relationship. The least you could do is be honest in everything. Do not comfort your partner with lies. Be upfront, truthful, and sincere.
What to Say
1. Inform your Partner there’s Something You Want to Discuss
Unlike the actual break up, informing your partner about something you want to talk about can be done online or via text but it is still highly recommended to do this in person or better yet when your partner does not have anything to work on.
2. Show Gratitude for the Good Times You Had with Him/Her
It’s crucial that you provide silver linings as much as you can, in order to keep your partner as sane as possible. You don’t want emotions to get the best out of the both of you.
Show your appreciation for everything you shared with, and then you can follow up with the problems in your relationship.
3. Address the Issues
Let your partner know what went wrong between you two. Share your issues about the relationship and explain each and every single one. Also, let your partner know that you are no longer willing to move forward in the relationship.
4. Tell Your Partner You Want to Separate
This is the most difficult part of the entire process, which is the break up itself. Now depending on what your partner’s reaction might be, you have to be certain that you do not leave him or her on the spot.
As you are telling your partner that you want to break up, stay for a while and continue to be there to listen to what your partner has to say.
Apologize that you had to make such a hard decision. You are literally tearing up your ex’s life apart. So, be patient but try to stay composed. Don’t go hugging or kissing directly like you used to do when you comfort him or her when you were in a relationship.
Avoid making physical contact always.
Be sincere when giving your assurance. Let your ex know that this is best this way and that it is better to break up rather than being forced to stay in the relationship. Additionally, let your ex know that whatever he or she achieves in the future, you will be happy and proud of his or her success.
7. Let Your Partner Reply
Hear what your ex has to say. As long as your ex won’t try to force you to stay, then listen to what he or she has in mind. Afterward, the both of you may leave. You can offer him or her a ride for the last time.
Lastly, live life, but this time without each other.